Always Remember: This is the person you have chosen to spend your life with.
Who taught you how to argue with your spouse? We learned, so now you can.
Later we'll post a podcast of a radio show and seminar I did with Dr. Harry Bradley, a Saint Louis Ph.D. psychologist on How to Fight Fair. I don't do a lot of recommendations, but if you have need of some counseling (and who doesn't) Harry is a great guy, the consummate professional counselor. We have worked together on projects and I saw Harry myself for counseling when I was diagnosed with cancer years back.
Today I'm going to talk a little bit about the advise I include in many weddings Address To The Couple about arguing with your spouse.
The fact is no relationship is perfect. No person is perfect (not even me!) So inevitable there will be some conflict in your marriage, somewhere along the line.
Noted author Robert Louis Stevenson wrote "Marriage is like life in that it is a field of battle.... and not a bed of roses."
Renowned psychologist Carl Jung stated," :Seldom or perhaps never, does a marriage develop into an individual relationship smoothly and without crises. There is no coming to consciousness without pain."
Sometimes when we argue we get angry. In anger, in order to win an argument, we may be tempted to say mean and terrible words to our spouse to win the argument. But terrible words, once said....may be forgiven because of love...but they will never be forgotten.
This is such an important statement that I want to repeat it again.
Terrible words once said....may be forgiven because of love....but they will never be forgotten.
Those unforgotten words will be the first brick in the wall between you. With enough of those bricks you will find yourself behind a wall so big neither of you can get around it.
Always Remember: This is the person you have chosen to spend your life with. Speak to them keeping that in mind.